To all:
Since the intial post I have sought help. I admitted myself to a local hospital for help.
Im not proud of the decision I made, but at the time I didnt trust myself. Lately my mind has been full of thoughts
and the thought process will not shut off. I find myself not sleeping not eating and most of all not participating in life.
Ive been in a depressed state for awhile, on and off meds trying to feel normal.
Yesterday was a breaking point, I felt like I was a hazard to myself, I am whats wrong with me and that there was nowhere to turn.
I posted what was going through my mind on here last night, and I am glad I did. After reading what was posted and talking to a few of you, I knew
that I can make it through no matter what. I realized that I have never met any of you in person but seeing the pm's and other responses on the topic
I knew who my real friends were, and I thank all of you for that.
I have a long road ahead of me. Im as my doctor called it Under Construction to make myself a better person give myself much deserved credit.
I truely appreciate you listening, you guys are the greatest group of friends, and I thank God for that.
James Roach